What is Self-Solemnization? Marry Yourselves, No Officiant Required!

The Beauty of Self-Solemnization

So, you’ve decided to elope—congratulations! You’re ditching the guest list drama, the pressure of pleasing extended family, and the stress of coordinating an over-the-top wedding. You're leaving the big huge wedding with the big huge price tag behind because that is what's right for YOU as a couple! Eloping is a dream. But what if I told you that you could take this whole "just us" concept a step further and marry yourselves? No officiant, no witnesses necessary, just the two of you, your love, and a marriage license. Welcome to the wonderful world of self-solemnization!

While most U.S. states require an officiant or at least a witness to make things official, a select few states and territories allow you to legally marry yourselves. Let’s dive into where and how you can pull off this incredibly personal and intimate ceremony.

Where You Can Self-Solemnize in the U.S.

Not every state is on board with the idea of a couple being both the "proposers" and the "officials" of their wedding, but here’s where you can legally self-solemnize:

Colorado – The OG of self-solemnization! No officiant or witnesses required. Just sign your marriage license, and boom—you’re married.
District of Columbia (D.C.) – Self-solemnization is legal, but you must apply for a special self-officiation marriage license.
Pennsylvania – You’ll need a Quaker-style marriage license, which is widely available in most counties.
Wisconsin – Self-solemnization is allowed, but couples must acknowledge that the state cannot guarantee its recognition outside of Wisconsin.
Illinois – Only legal if you identify with a religion that doesn’t require officiants (this can be a gray area, so check with the county clerk).
Nevada – You can technically self-solemnize, but only if one of you is ordained.
California – Some counties allow it under a "non-clergy" designation, but rules vary, so check locally.

Other Important Logistics for Self-Solemnization

Self-solemnization is liberating, but there are still some logistical details to consider:

Marriage License – You still need one! Make sure you apply for a marriage license in the state where you plan to marry.
Filing the License – After you sign it, you’ll need to return the completed marriage license to the county clerk’s office within the required time frame (varies by state).
Legal Recognition – Most states recognize self-solemnized marriages from other states, but if you’re moving or filing taxes jointly, it’s worth double-checking.
Residency Requirements – Most states that allow self-solemnization do not have residency requirements, meaning you can travel to one of these states, get married, and return home with a legally recognized marriage.
Ceremony Details – Just because there’s no officiant doesn’t mean you can’t have a meaningful ceremony! Write vows, choose a breathtaking location, and make it as special as you want.
Name Change Process – If either of you plans to change your last name, be sure to follow the proper steps after getting your marriage certificate.
Witnesses (or Lack Thereof) – Some states require no witnesses, but if you want family or friends to "sign" in a symbolic way, get creative with a guestbook or photo evidence!

Why Self-Solemnization is So Special

Self-solemnization is the ultimate declaration of autonomy in love. It allows you to:

Have complete control over your wedding experience – No need to worry about coordinating schedules or following traditions you don’t vibe with.
Focus entirely on each other – The ceremony is truly just about the two of you and your commitment.
Get married anywhere – A mountain peak, your backyard, the streets of Paris—wherever your hearts desire.
Save money – No officiant fees or venue restrictions mean you can allocate your budget to what truly matters to you.

The Beauty of a Ceremony That’s Truly Yours

Self-solemnization is a deeply personal and meaningful way to exchange vows without outside influence. It puts the power to shape your wedding day entirely in your hands. Your love story is unique, and with self-solemnization, your wedding can be just as special. However you choose to celebrate, may it be a day that reflects your love, your values, and your commitment to each other in the purest way possible.